A Mother's Love Never Dies

• inspired by the song "All that love from here" by Wynonna Judd 

Robert’s mother, Sarah, had died five years ago.  They, as well as the rest of the family had always been very close.

“As long as I have a place to live, you have a place to live,” his mother once said to him when he was falling on hard times.

He had graduated from college, but could not find work.  He majored in finance in college; however, because of the sputtering economy and the woes of the housing market, he could not find work.  He settled for a job as manager at a local McDonald’s.  The meager income that he received in a job not measuring up to his skill level barely kept him afloat.  Thus, he lived at home until he could find work matching his abilities.

He awoke every morning at a home that seemed to be much too constrictive for his needs.  He had to be to work 6 days a week.  Usually he opened the store himself while his employees sifted in over the next hour or two.

It was problematic working with such a young group of employees.  Although he was no more than seven years older than most of them, the complexities of having such a staff interfered with the social opportunities of work.  He had other co-workers who were his superiors in the company hierarchy; however, more often than not he worked closely with a group of high school students and those in their late teens.

When his mom had died a few years back, it was a very emotional time for his family.  His brother, George, and his sister, Emily, both flew in from halfway across the country to attend the funeral and the wake.

“Mom always had it hard,” his sister Emily said to her brother Robert before the funeral was to begin. 

Throughout the wake, they enjoyed coffee and each other’s company to celebrate a life.  Emily and George’s kids flew in with their parents across the country, but they were unable to understand the event which centered on a grandmother they never got the opportunity to know.  Robert was still living close to his mother when she passed away and had been in charge of the painful funeral arrangements.

At the funeral, all of Sarah’s children had cried.  However, there were no loud outbursts; instead, they cried in a silent and dignified manner attempting to max their emotions which were very strong.

After her divorce, their mother had moved back to Washington State where her brother and sister lived.  Seattle was close enough to most of them and she used it has an opportunity for personal reflection.  However difficult the divorce was, her family members offered the emotional support she needed to recover.

Today, five years after the funeral, Robert visited his mother’s grave to place flowers.  Every year he took the time as an opportunity to commemorate his mother’s life.  The tears no longer flowed, but his eyes would still get misty. 

Standing there next to her grave, Robert could finally sense the completion of his mother’s life.  He knew that she was in heaven praying for him as he prayed for her.  Death is transitory and it does no good to weep in sorrow for those who are now gone.  It was not only the love for her that remained strong, but also the sense that her love for him remained strong.

Here Comes the Sun

He sat in his room, alone drinking whiskey.  He didn’t have any friends outside of the school setting.  He was sure to get home from school as fast as he could to open up another hard bottle of whiskey.

The first thing in the morning, Thomas poured a cup of coffee and lit up a cigarette.  The thought of facing a day without the solace he found in alcohol was assuming, thus, he poured himself two or three glasses before class.

This routine typified his high school experience.  Despite his drinking, Thomas was able to get into college.  His adequate grades in high school allowed him to make the trek to Chico State in northern California.  He had heard that it was a party school which is what attracted him to the location.  Although he drank heavily, which was characteristic of the other students, his endeavor into the matter guised a different purpose.  His friends in college drank with all the best of intentions, while Thomas drank to the point of belligerence, attempting to mask the all-encompassing sorrow that had become to define his life.

The first night at the dorms was memorable, in that instead of drinking to a stupor within the confines of his home, he did so in the midst of a college party in which he had been immersed.  At the beginning of the night, before his drunken haze kicked in, his mask of depression was hidden well, like it had been during the morning hours in high school.

“Make a move,” one of his recently acquainted roommates said to him.  “She likes you,” he said in reference to the girl who had made her way through the party to sit next to Thomas.

In response to the suggestion, Thomas took another swig of whiskey and chased it with gulp of beer.  He did not know how to talk to her or how to make a forward move.

The party went on.  As the hours past Thomas sank deeper and deeper into the grips of his accustomed inebriation. 

At about 11:00 p.m. at night, it was time to exit the party and retreat to his room.  He stumbled there to relish a few more drinks without the distraction of the party in which he could pursue his own misery.

He brought along the half-empty bottle of whiskey and turned on his stereo to a collection of his particularly depressing CD’s.  It was his endeavor to despair to which he actively pursued.  He put on a Willie Nelson CD.  It had a fine selection of drinking songs which highlighted his mood and helped him wallow even deeper into his personal desolation.

“Whiskey River, take my mind.  Don’t let her memory torture me.  Whiskey River don’t run dry.  You’re all I got to carry me.”(Willie Nelson)

He fought back the tears in a way he didn’t have to while he was in high school.

Over his first two years in college this was the manner in which he led his life.  He was not as transparent in his misery as he believed himself to be.  Although, none of his friends ever mentioned it to him, at times, they discussed it among themselves.

“What we gotta do it to find him a girlfriend,” one of his friends said to another.

Once a girl, one of his friend’s girlfriends finally confided in him.  “Why do you drink so much?”

“I don’t know,” he responded.  Not ready to open up to anybody, not even his close friends. He poised his answer as if he was drinking just to be part of the crowd.

She did not want to be intrusive, so she didn’t mention the oblique depression which he seemed to strive for.  “You’re a smart guy.”  She guided him. 

She didn’t know how to tell him, she couldn’t believe he didn’t know.  But she thought it would be better to tell him.  “Everybody already likes you.  You don’t have to drink so much.”

It didn’t quite hit him then.  He continued to live his life in a bog of self-pity.

After years of depression, one day he woke up and noticed a bright, cool, spring day. 

It was not through his own willpower that he made the discovery.  It was only after complete resignation that he was able to discover that there were actually things to live for.

He woke up the next morning and, once again, the sky was blue and the air was crisp. 

Although he did not have a girlfriend of his own, he and his friend, Peter, and Peter’s girlfriend strolled to one of the neighborhood coffee shops.  It was a magnificent day that he could not ignore.  They sat down and enjoyed a couple of iced coffee’s where there was no more needed to enjoying the day than good conversation.

The next day, Thomas woke up early.  Instead of a hangover, he enjoyed a fresh cup of coffee and a cigarette on his balcony welcoming a new day.  He walked to class with his eyes wide open and as he ventured through campus he could not count all the reasons to live for.  It was another sunny day.  For no reason that he could name he had a smile on his face. 

He got home from class and he put on one of his roommates CD’s.  It was The Beatles Abbey Road.  He stood on his balcony and enjoyed a cigarette and a cool glass of iced tea.  He noticed one of his neighbors.  Her name was Alicia.  Although they had been neighbors for over five months, they did not know each other well.  He gazed upon her auburn hair.

As Thomas basked in the early afternoon spring air, the music played in the background. 

“Little darling, I feel that ice is slowly melting.  Little darling, it feels like years since its been here. Here comes the sun and I say.  It’s all right.”(The Beatles)

Alicia looked up at Thomas and flashed him a smile.  He took another sip of ice tea and lit himself another cigarette savoring the invigorating spring day.

A Father's Love

• inspired by the song "I'm so happy, I can't stop crying" by Toby Keith

“May I now pronounce you, Man and Wife,” the preacher said without hesitation.  “You may kiss the bride.”

The church, packed with people from front to back, viewed the ceremony after years of anticipation.  Jacob and Shelly had been planning on the wedding for more than a year.  Before that, they had been dating for more than three years.  Much talk around town centered on the topic of when these two would be married.  This conversation was even more prevalent among their closest friends.

The audience all had attended the wedding shower the night before.  The group had gathered at a Hilton in a nearby town and they had shared in a magnificent dinner to celebrate the occasion.  The young and old, from small towns all over the state, shared in the merriments of the wedding.  After the dinner, music played and people danced.  Although neither family was extremely wealthy, they had managed to put together a lavish wedding.

The preacher announced, “You may kiss the bride.”  Shelly’s father let loose the tears that he had been welling up all through the ceremony.  The women, young and old, also passed around handkerchiefs.  The adults in both of the families considered such events to be more just an excuse for festivity, but also events of almost religious magnitude.

The ceremony continued.  The bride and groom walked out the church.  Row by row, the audience followed them out the back door of the church.  After the photos were taken, the bride threw the bouquet and the groom threw the garter belt.

Later that night they were to meet back at the nearby Hilton to share the revelry which is typical after wedding vows.  They hired a DJ and they all danced and listened along with their favorite songs which were specifically chosen for the ceremony.  Along with dinner, much beer, wine, and champagne was served. 

The older guests of the wedding always enjoyed these events that happened every year or two.  It was the first opportunity to experience an occasion such as this for many of the younger people in the audience.  Shelly’s father’s eyes stayed misty through the rest of the event.  The celebrations that incurred at the wedding reception did little to disguise his emotions.

He could remember clearly the day that his daughter had been born.  They had to drive all the way into Atlanta when his wife was ready to give birth.  He stood in the waiting room, patiently anticipating the news from her doctor.  It was to be his first child and the nervousness and anxiety that he felt was palpable.

The doctor entered the room.  “Congratulations, you are now the proud father of a baby girl.”

His eyes remained misty, however, a half-hour later when he was allowed to see his wife and his baby daughter he could not hold back the tears. 

His wife asked, “Would you like to hold your little girl?”  She was wrapped in a pink blanket and, as he cradled her in his arms, tears fell from his eyes.  He knew that the love that he felt for his baby daughter would always be there.  

It was but the beginning of the life of the newborn as it was near the beginning of married life for the young couple.  Their love was strong and as the years past it only grew stronger.  The sentiments of the years created memories and the memories invoked tears.  The family's love matured and evolved into a truly blessed life.  Although it was a simple life, it was that of the most robust emotions of familiar love which endeared them all.