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Friday, February 24, 2012

Pomposity in the Virtuosity of Professorship

The first thing every morning was to make fresh brewed Columbian coffee.  He did so religiously before breakfast and showering. 

It was Yuban 100% Columbian coffee.  He made himself three cups worth.  He put exactly one half teaspoon of sugar and two tablespoons of creamer in each.

He brushed his teeth; top teeth three times and bottom teeth three times.  He shaved, using a straight razor and Gillette foam.  He showered with two pumps of Prell shampoo to wash is hair.

He arrived to the University at 8:45 a.m. 

“The mundane trivialities of vocational pursuits,” he thought to himself.

He taught his first class at 10:00 a.m.  While waiting for the class to begin, he spent the hour between 8:45 a.m. and 9:45 a.m. with office work.

The time for class came and he arrived at exactly 9:55 a.m.  It was his first class he taught of nine per week.  Today he would be teaching college students about the subject of political philosophy.

The students all arrived at approximately 10:00 a.m. and he began his lecture.

“The epistemology of the relegation of the conceptual framework of the constitution of The United States has been demoted to a historical antidote in light of the judicial activism which has taken control of the Supreme Court in recent decades.”

He looked out in the room of young faces as he marveled in his own intellect.

“Beginning with the Roosevelt years, judicial nominees has been cultivated by their political affiliations rather than by which the principles in which they abide to follow the principles set forth by the framers of the constitution.  Thus, esoterically speaking, the powers of the presidency have usurped those initially intended to be the jurisdiction of the judicial branch of government.”

Without as much as a twinkle in the eyes of the students of understanding, the professor continued.

“Judicial activism has spurred a spirited debate concerning the true objectives set forth by the originators of the constitution.  Many incessantly argue that the constitution was a document written not as simply a guideline to run our government, but as a certificate not to be infringed upon due to the personal autonomy it promised to all in the country.  It was not meant to be twisted and contorted to the point where it was no longer a dictum by which to run the government of the United States and the absolute standard of law in this country.”

The students in the class looked up at the clock on the wall.  It was only a fifty minute class, but from the monotonous tone of the professor it seemed much longer. 

The professor continued.  “A multitude of court cases in recent decades have been brought forth to the court.  From a very liberal interpretation of the constitution and interpretation of other precedents set forth from previous court cases, the law of the land, which was said to be the constitution, has been contorted at will as the causation of judicial activists that recent presidents have nominated to the courts.”

Although they lacked enthusiasm for the class, the students all took notes and tried their best to learn even with the insipid discussion led by the professor.

One student looked up at the clock on the wall.  It said, 10:49 a.m.  He stared at the clock for the last minute of the class.  He counted down the final seconds of the class; five, four, three, two, one.  Class had finally ended. 

The students all left the classroom.  They were not eager for the repetition of the same nonsensical banter on the next meeting with the instructor.

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